This would remove the illusion, but it wouldn’t change the circumstances. I could be her subject as long as I could be myself. But that wouldn’t b... me. I wouldn’t be myself. It’s so clear to me now I almost laugh. I don’t want to go back to Carl. I don’t want to leave June. I don’t want the life I had. What I have is certainly fucked up, but I like so much of it. When this is over, I want to go back to June and have her serve me. I want to cuddle in her arms tonight while she tells me I don’t. It wasn’t the first time he’d apologised. He’d lost count of how many times he’d said sorry, but it didn’t change anything. He’d still hurt her, still been too stupid and immature to suck up his insecurities and just tell her he loved her. Now she’d never know how sorry he was. Tears welled in Natalie’s eyes, one stray little drop spilling out down her cheek and Matt reached out to wipe it away. He saw Natalie frown, her eyes boring into the space he occupied. Her fingers reached forward,. More

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