My deepest fear was realized time and again…no one wanted me, for any amount of time. I always fucked up and they always walked away. There was an ...mpty bottle of wine that lay shattered against the locked door. I didn’t know why I had locked it. No one would be coming to see me, to save me. This was my own personal hell, created for and by me. This is where I would live, the monstrosity of pain that I had built on trying to be what no one really wanted. I had not eaten for days. The hunger. So when Spring Break came around a week after my mutual break-up with Michael, Ali and I decided to go all out and book last minute plane tickets to Cancun, Mexico—gifts from our parents for getting into the one of the best colleges in the country for our majors. Skimpy bikinis from Victoria’s Secret, short and tight dresses, high heels and flip flops practically burst out of our luggage as we made our way to Cancun. We arrived mid-afternoon and rushed to check in to our resort so we could get. More

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