"I've not got a condom," I said. Actually, this wasn't strictly true. I had two in my jacket pocket that I keep with me should the need arise, plus I'... noticed the men's pool changing room had a machine that sold them. I was just starting to wonder about the logistics of getting out of the pool with a massive hard on impossible to hide in Speedo trunks, applying condom to said hard on and returning with hard on plus condom to the pool when she said "Don't worry about it, I'm safe". All. They tell us what to do.’ ‘Even down to the lead actor in a tacky little racing film?’ I said. ‘I find that hard to believe.’ ‘Believe what you will, Christina,’ Starkey said. ‘It happens to be the truth. I get a phone call one day from the home office, they say ‘use Paul Bayard in quicklime’. So I use him. I make it a point not to argue with the home office.’ ‘All right, Desmond,’ I said. ‘Thanks for nothing.’ ‘Any time, sweetheart,’ he said cheerfully. ‘And don’t be a stranger.’ We hung up.. More

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