This wasn’t like that either. Yes, Hayden was a quivering blob but there was something more or at least different to what I was experiencing. An emo...ional connection? I couldn’t explain it and even if Betty had told me right then I wouldn’t have understood it. I just knew this wasn’t like those photos either.I did believe this wasn’t abuse though. I still hadn’t reconciled how I could hurt or hit someone I liked though.“Sometimes I have to be cruel to be kind. Do you understand?” Betty asked. So I dressed and walked back to the hotel, leaving Miss X (was she a Brigitte, a Camille, a Genevieve?) to the gaze of the other men. All the while berating myself for my cowardice. I couldn’t muster the courage to say Bonjour to her, much less discuss my passion or our future. I vowed that if I encountered her again, somehow I would not waste the opportunity.A few days went by, and although I glimpsed her from afar occasionally, there never was a time we were together. But, thank you Club. More

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