It took me weeksto recover from that day in the hotel and, with Ryan nowhere to be foundI reached into our coke stash and drugged my low self-esteem a...d paininto oblivion. I became a recluse. I'd be fucked up for days and thenI'd come to for a day and try to get my life back on track. But I wasparalyzed because I had too many problems. Should I find a job? Whereshould I live? What should I say to Ryan? It felt like the sky hadfallen. I'd sit there and think about all of these things and. Ok, we never been their but always wanted to try it. I will call for 5PM dinner time. She walked over to me as I grabbed the phone to call the restaurant in the kitchen.Mark you are the sweetest, kindest, strongest, good looking, and most of all “My Man. That was the a great think to do by giving the reward money back to the victims and the kids for the city. It was the right thing to do because I don’t need the money. I was on hold with the restaurant as Maria moved to her knees in her. More

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