" I'm sorry, Mr. President, but rules are rules." Please, there must be something you can do. I need to cash this check so I can buy Michelle aValenti...e's Day present."The cashier thinks for a minute."I'll tell you what, Mr. President. Two weeks ago, Tiger Woods was here and in the same situation. He proved who he was by making an amazing putt all the way across the bank lobby into a coffee cup."Then, just last week, Andre Agassi had to prove who he was, so he used his tennis racket and lobbed. " His penis was the only part of him left that "worked," and it worked very well. Too good, really. I once overheard his family asking the doctor about "harvesting" his semen for a sperm bank or something, and I heard the doctor tell them it was the most potent semen he'd ever found. I don't know if they ever did anything about it. I thought it was pretty sick. I mean, he's a vegetable. I would have thought that odds of birth defects were just about certain.Once I went too far and brought him. More

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