Things that my husband, and many others, just did not see. They saw me as a whole, as who I am, all wrapped up together in a body that may not be perf...ct but that is not what they wanted. They did not expect perfection did they, when they looked at my body. Just as when I looked at these paintings I did not expect a photograph. I expected a realistic representation of life, complete with the signs of it being created by a human, which included flaws. Flaws that did not take away but enhanced.. Well I guess ... I mean I'm just not ready. Plus I'm damaged goods. I've got a plate in my head..." Don't care," she interrupted." ... and I have flashbacks to unpleasant times..." Me too. We can hold each other when they come," she interrupted again." ... and I have a spirit in my head that talks to me, and I'm paranoid about everything. I probably have PTSD and I'll wake up someday a raving lunatic, or worse." I like Martinez. He visited my head when we were in Florida, you know. I don't care. More

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