It’s too much, Silmaria. I won’t let you be yet more blood on my hands.” Silmaria glared up at him, her hands balled into fists as she seethed w...th defiance until she was physically shaking with it. Then all at once, her resolve and anger crumbled, and her shakes became barely restrained sobs. Her lower lip trembled. She leapt forward unexpectedly and pressed herself against him, her small hands gripping the front of his wool shirt as she pressed her face into his chest. “I don’t care about. It was too soon to even pretend that I was getting over her or getting completely out of being in love with her. There was a lot of pain and a big void inside. Someone in a movie once used the term, "soul-sick." I kinda felt like that. The flywheel still had a lot of angular momentum and was still spinning.I brooded. I had obviously been a big flop as a husband. In hindsight, I thought I could see dozens of ways that I could have done better. Been more attentive to her needs, been more open. More

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