...........What a fucked up life this is I thought.I had taken my laptop to the states and on it I had photographs of Amanda and I in happier times, s...me nights my heart would feel heavy at the loss, but I never let it show in my few emails to Amanda, I had been in the states about 5 months when I received a email from Susan saying how worried she was about Amanda it seemed she had lost a lot of weight and was in trouble keeping on top of her job so much so that she had been forced to take some. . flat. It wasweird.I walked around and I realised that one of the pictures was actually amirror. I walked over to it quickly and stood in front of it. I caughta reflection starting back at me even though it was rather dark. It wasthe image of a woman. She had flowing silky black hair and her face wasquite recognisable. I thought about it, then I could definitely pickout my face in the woman's. It was just more... feminine. The cheekswere quite high now and the nose smaller and cute. I also. More

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